Monday, March 28, 2011

Joke Evolution A.K.A. The Cookie Joke

Feb 28 2011:
A unionized public employee, a member of the Tea Party, and a CEO are sitting at a table. In the middle of the table there is a plate with a dozen cookies on it. The CEO reaches across and takes 11 cookies looks at the Tea Partier and says,"look out for that union guy, he wants a piece of your cookie."

A CEO, tea-bagger and a union worker are sitting around a table, which has a plate with a dozen cookies on it. The CEO takes eleven of the cookies, then turns to the tea-bagger and says "Watch out. That union thug wants to steal your cookie."

Mar 1 2011:
Did you hear the one about the Koch Brothers, the tea party member, and the democrat who sat down to share a dozen cookies? The Koch brothers ate 11 then turned to the tea party member and said "you better watch that socialist. He wants to steal your cookie!"

Mar 2 2011:
A CEO, a union guy, and Mitch Daniels were sitting at a table with a dozen donuts. The CEO grabbed 11 of them right away. When the union guy reached for the last one, Daniels said to the CEO, "That union guy is trying to steal your donut!"

A corporate fat cat, tea party activist, and a worker are sitting a table and someone brings them 
a plate of 10 cookies... Immediately, the fat cat grabs 9 of the cookies. He then leans over to 
the worker and whispers "you'd better look out for that tea party guy, 
I think he's going to try to steal your cookie".

March 3 2011:
A CEO, a Tea Party member and a union employee sit down at a table with a dozen cookies. The CEO takes 11 cookies and then whispers in the ear of the Tea Party member, "Hey, that union guy is trying to steal your cookie so you better get on that."

March 4 2011:
A CEO, a union member, and a front-line worker were standing in front of a cookie jar. The CEO opened the jar, withdrew eleven of the twelve cookies in there, and put them in his suit pocket. He then turned to the front-line worker and said, "watch out for that union guy! He's trying to steal your cookie!

March 5 2011:
A CEO, a Tea Party member and public teacher unionist met at a coffee shop. Soon the waitress brought a dozen cookies to the table. The CEO immediately grabbed eleven. Then he turned to the Tea Partier and said, “Watch that union guy; he’s trying to steal your cookie.”

March 6 2011:
A Wall Street banker, a Tea Party guy and a union lady are standing around a dozen cookies. The banker grabs 11 cookies and tells the Tea Party guy, “That union lady is trying to steal your cookie.”


March 28 2011:
(rather poorly told, but the version now being quoted most because of its source)
Barrett recounted a parable making the rounds among Wisconsin Democrats, telling of a room in which “a zillionaire, a Tea Party person and a union member” confront a plate of 12 cookies: “The zillionaire takes 11 of the cookies, and says to the other two, ‘That guy is trying to steal your cookie.’ ”

ADDENDUM - October 10 2011: 
(As retold by CTH on Facebook)
A billionaire sits at a table with a Tea Partier and a poor person. There are ten cookies on the table; the billionaire takes 9 then says to the Tea Partier, "Watch that guy -- he's after your cookie!"


ADDENDUM - August 6 2015:
(As posted by Europe Says OXI on Facebook) This version apparently has a connection with the Euro-Greek financial crisis.

























Addendum: October 1, 2018, as posted by Left Action on Facebook.



Sunday, March 27, 2011

Letter to a friend

Dear Xxxx;

I live in the Kooks Museum. I have studied kooks, cranks, cults and conspiracies for decades and know that though the content may vary, the form remains the same. I know how exciting it is to find a conspiracy theory you can really get your teeth into and be a big expert on and know all the elaborate details that make you the one who knows, and anyone who disagrees is pitiably ignorant of the important facts of this thing, which in reality has nothing to do with any of us and is really just a lot of people quoting people quoting people who read something somewhere, who have absolutely no direct personal knowledge or experience of the thing and would not be negatively effected if they woke up the next day and all knowledge of the subject was wiped from their minds. It's always interesting, but kind of sad, to see someone I like get swallowed up in one of these things, but luckily this is the kind of topic that will blow over in a few months. I knew a guy who suddenly became a Money Crank, boring the living hell out of everyone around him by constantly babbling about monetary theory, capitalism, inflation and the shocking Federal Reserve fraud. My acquaintanceship with him ended because I wrote to him as openly and honestly as I am to you, that I was glad he found something he really enjoyed, but sorry to see him making such a damn fool of himself. That's the same thing I am saying to you now, and if you need to defriend me over it, that will be a shame. I think you are a really nice guy and I always enjoyed reading what you had to say about things until you went off on this idiotic bullshit. I hope you work your way through it soon and get back to being funny and interesting instead of self-righteous and pedantic on this incredibly uninteresting and irrelevant crap.