Movies

Inspecteur Lavardin (1986) Jean Poiret returns in this follow-up to Poulet au vinaigre as the morally expedient Lavardin. There seem to be no good guys, nobody purely admirable in a Chabrol film. This is a complex and entertaining story of crime and detection, admirably executed. 9/10

I tried to watch The Boss of it All, knowing that a Lars von Trier film is a crapshoot but willing to give it a try since it professed to be a comedy. Apparently he thought it would be funny to shoot all the dialog three or four times with the camera in different locations, and then cut each line in from a different shot. After 11 minutes of being whacked on the head every few seconds with "Look how cute I can be," I said to hell with this crap and this is the last thing by that guy I will ever waste my time on. Instead I watched something that wasn't designed to continually distract you from the story:

The Private Life of Don Juan (1934) Douglas Fairbanks' last film, as a man who can no longer live up to his legend. Huge sets and absurdly elaborate costumes, just a lot of fluff. Nothing to write home about but I'd rather just have fun watching something kind of silly than be tortured by "art." 6/10

Movies

Margarette's Feast (2000) Brazilian social comedy in "silent movie" style. Like many silent features it gets tiresome, but there are some redeeming values. A nice try, and not the worst Brazilian movie I have ever seen. 5/10

Movies

Terror is a Man (1959) I stayed up til 1 a.m. watching this, allegedly the first Filipino monster movie. Scientist on lonely island is trying to evolve a panther into a human. Swathed in bandages, it is at one point set alight by the deranged lab assistant, providing the unique spectacle of a flaming man-cat-mummy. Plods along at a moderate pace, with the startling hourglass figure of the professor's blonde wife as punctuation. Worth seeing once just so you can say you did. 6/10

I tried to watch Bangrajan (2000), a Thai historical epic about an 18th century Burmese invasion of Siam, but sadly the filmmakers were so devoted to being stylish and arty that it was too difficult for me even to decipher what I was seeing. If you are trying to tell a story and to show people images of what is happening, it's better to let them actually see it, not make it all friggin chiarascuro and stuff ya artsy-assed bastards. Dammit!

Jaziereh ahani [Iron Island] (2005) Fascinating Iranian story of a community on a decaying, slowly sinking ship. Does not resemble my daily life or anything I ever saw or experienced, which is what I am looking for in a movie. Amazing to see. 9/10

Movies

Ariel (1988) Directed by Aki Kaurismaki. I've seen these Finnish movies on the library shelf occasionally and finally decided to give one a try. This is a rather bleak, yet strangely calm, look at life on the lower edge of society where Stoic Finns do what they have to do without worrying about ethics. Somewhere in Finland people may be happy and beautiful but not here. Can Finland really be this dismal? Not much dialog, and almost every detail was something I had never seen anything quite like before. This same story could have been made into a John Garfield movie and been a real thriller - yet this never gets exciting at all, not the half-assed crimes, the prison break, nothing. Kaurismaki is on my list of people to see more movies by. 9/10

Recent Viewing

Poulet au vinaigre (1985) Directed by Claude Chabrol. I strongly protest the attempt to carry over the food-related titling in the idiotic Cop au Vin by which it is known in USA. However, this is an interesting and entertaining tale of small-town misbehavior in which one murder leads to another. None of the characters is fully likeable, even the protagonists being rather despicable in some ways. I must learn more about Chabrol. 7/10

Elle est des notres [She's one of us] (2003) Directed by Siegrid Alnoy. One of those movies where people stand immobile and expressionless, staring off into space, and when someone walks out of the shot they just leave the camera going for a while so you look at what was behind them and go "hmmm..." Interesting in a way though, in that one may not fully realize that France too has strip malls, industrial parks, condo suburbs, and stores with names like Monsieur Meuble (Mr. Furniture). I liked the fact that it was almost always grey and rainy and, like me, the main character finds her attempts to communicate normally with those around her often fall flat and she seems least comfortable when people are trying to be friendly, most tormented when everyone around her is having their version of fun. 6/10

Dekigokoro [Passing Fancy] (1933) Directed by Ozu Yasujiro, my favorite director. Like his other silent films, far more sophisticated and accomplished than many sound films made years later anywhere in the world. The pacing on this was a bit more uneven and I kept thinking it was about to end and then it didn't. It's a small light drama of a handful of rather poverty-stricken and mostly uneducated people and their mutual interactions. Ozu is always great with child/parent interactions, and he chose his actors well. My one serious gripe with this release is with the modern musical track. If I were going to provide a score for a silent Japanese film I would at least try to find someone who knew something about music of that nation and period, or locate someone in Japan who still actually accompanies silent films - surely there must be someone in that nation who has preserved that skill. I wouldn't just find some joker who can do random jazzy noodling for an hour and a half, slap it onto the disc, and think I had done it justice. I eventually had to turn off the tinny clinking noises and watch it completely silent. Movie - 8/10 Music - 0/10

My wasted life.

Oh who the hell cares.

Movies

Trying to catch up on a big stack of movies from the library, so I watched two today.

Ornamental Hairpin (1941) Directed by Hiroshi Shimizu, part of the Criterion Collection's excellent Eclipse series. A very pleasant Summer Holiday story, nothing earthshaking, just a really nice story well presented. Perhaps a little extra poignance (if that is a word) is added by the knowledge that the lovely quiet world depicted here was just about to be literally blown to hell forever. 8/10

Ratatouille (2007) I went into this as a Cultural Duty, as I often do with Disney/Pixar's perpetual "masterpieces," expecting it to be a bit of a chore, or at least to feel at some point that I wasn't sure I could keep going, but I would force myself and sit through it to the end. After 20 minutes I stopped it, went downstairs to where Donna was working and said, "You have to come watch this movie. Just trust me on this." I started it over and we watched it, and really had a pleasant time. This is the finest thing they have ever done. The settings, characters, dialog, expressions and story are outstanding, and if you are a detail freak like me, every moment is a dream, every tile and cobblestone luscious. This Paris is more French than even Paris itself. Witty, charming and, yes, delightful. I swear, when the rat first started cooking, I wanted to cry, it was so brilliant. 10/10

Movies

Meet the Robinsons (2007) A very well constructed time travel cartoon. It drags the most in the middle section when it is supposed to be the most exciting - there are so many extraneous characters, irrelevant gags and meaningless events that amid all the pointless spectacle I almost quit watching. I'm glad I didn't though, because once they get back to actually telling the story they really pull it out of the fire and deliver some genuinely interesting, entertaining and touching stuff. I think the fact that it was based on someone else's story and not just cooked up in the Disney studio kept it from being 90% factory formula. I would just edit out most of the middle third and keep the parts that actually have plot. 6/10

A Conversation

This is a conversation, recorded as accurately as I can remember it, between me (K) and my wife (D) which took place this morning. It just shows how complicated things can be when two people have completely different styles of communication.

K: (watching D check her email) How many emails do you get per day?
D: Well, the spam all goes into the spam box, but regular emails I get maybe 20 or 30.
K: So how many is that total per day?
D: Oh, that's just in the morning. In the afternoon...
K: Total.
D: Oh. Spams I get about...
K: My question is, (very slowly and clearly) "How many EMAILS do you get PER DAY?" Hundreds?
D: Per day? Hundreds, yes.
K: Hundreds. Thank you.

Movies

Gemini (Soseiji) 1999 - A story by Edogawa Ranpo, from the director of Tetsuo the Iron Man. I keep hoping somone will translate more Ranpo into english before I die, but there seems to be more of a market for teen romance manga. Anyway, this is one of those movies somebody probably thinks is the greatest thing they have ever seen because everything is as weird and crazy as possible and nobody has eyebrows, and they create drama by jerking the camera around instead of actually having some kind of skill or intention. Lots of bright colors and moving objects in some parts, and some scenes are interesting to look at. Maybe I'm still just mad from earlier in the evening. 3/10

Dream

I won some sort of prize which required me to go onstage at a Rolling Stones Concert. Mick was singing, wearing a big white fake fur jacket. When he saw me he came toward me smiling and still singing, causing me to shout, "But I HATE the Rolling Stones! I hate them WORSE THAN ANYTHING!" Yet he came closer and closer, finally wrapping his arms around me in a big hug. In a panic of chagrin, the only thing I could think of to do was shout, "SEX PISTOLS RULE!!!"

Movies

War of the Planets (1977) Donna wanted to see a '70s SF movie and chose this from our collection. One of the better Al Bradley (Alberto Breschia) movies, which isn't saying a lot. This makes four times I have seen it and I still can't tell what's going on at some points. Unrateable.

The Gnome-mobile (1967) I was recently reminded that I had never seen this. My sister was friends with the daughter of the owner of our town's only theater (Skyline, Canon City Colorado), who believed that this film would destroy the theater's credibility and bring about its end. It doesn't seem to have done so, as it is still in business. There is some fairly entertaining stuff in this, and Walter Brennan's double role gives him the opportunity to do more screaming than he probably ever did outside The Real McCoys. Enjoyable obliteration of a Cadillac limousine with Richard Deacon aboard, and cameos by Alvy Moore, Sam Cady and Ellen Corby. Classifiable as "irritainment" for adults but I'm sure it's a lot of fun for kids, with all the chasing around and shouting. 6/10

Movies

Fox Legend (1991) Hong Kong magical fantasy pitting Hunt King against the Nine Tailed Fox Demon and her minions. Surprisingly little fighting, lots of floating draperies, much of the story focusing on the doomed romance between the daughter of the Fox Demon and the last scion of a family of fur traders. Very colorful and crazy from the first minute. Disc includes trailers for 29 other movies, which must be some kind of record. 7/10

POOP BERRY TRIAL OFFER

I have recently been enjoying a diverse crop of propaganda, amateur and professional, especially that dedicated to the Magic Poop Berry. I can hardly look at a commercial website or even check my mail without having my brain instantaneously invaded by a superbly crafted yet meaningless phrase referring to this wonder fruit. It seems to have been discovered by a single mom somewhere in the Amazon rain forest, who found a miraculous way to achieve that holy grail of weight loss, a flat stomach. I gained even more knowledge from a few minutes of a television infomercial which sent me zooming through a virtual bowel, taking, I presume, the magic poop berry's own belly-flattening viewpoint as it rips through your innards. Photos of big flabby guts and fat old people were juxtaposed with slim young women (never more than three pounds over in their lives) leaping joyfully on the beach and wrapping a tape measure around their perfect waists with inches to spare. I soon learned that my sluggish bowels, and yours too, may produce that hideous bulging gut by retaining up to several pounds of impacted waste matter. That's a quote - up to several pounds - and a masterstroke of the propagandist's art, a perfectly meaningless phrase which you probably zipped right past just now. How many is several? More than two? Less than eight? Anything less than several is "up to" several, so up to several means the same as "some or less." That is, it means nothing - yet it seems to mean something. "Up to" is one of the supreme triumphs of the art, and whenever you see it, look out. The perfect propaganda is a short simple phrase which seems to mean something but is meaningless if not outright false. The magic poop berry, it is never said outright, is a laxative. You take it and it makes you poop out the up to several pounds of poop that didn't get pooped out and, if the image association is to believed, transforms you from a grumpy old flab bag into a young slim leaping woman or muscle-bulging chest-hair-less young weightlifting man. Yet they never actually say that, the factual parts or the false parts.

Some infomercials never tell you how much the product actually costs. Never mind that trick where they double the offer if you order now, just pay separate shipping and handling of eight to ten dollars to get your FREE product that costs them a couple of bucks tops. I saw a new way yesterday of not saying how much the product actually costs, in an infomercial for an exciting new product that will save you so much money and is really fun and new! Set in a fake kitchen, an excited couple, who do not hesitate to tell you how excited they are, share their exciting new product discovery with a handful of low-grade actors pretending to be their friends. This great new money-saving device is available for a risk-free thirty-day trial offer for only $19.99! If not insanely delighted, just return it and you will not owe another dime! No, you don't get you twenty bucks back, or the ten bucks you pay them for shipping it to you, or your own shipping costs to send it back, they just don't make you pay the rest of whatever the thing would cost you. You get to rent it for a month.

I like propaganda so much because it can slip things like that right past us. Yes, we were told the terms of the deal but we didn't know it. We were told nothing at all but thought we were told something meaningful. We were given a short, exciting phrase we could repeat to others which excites their emotions just as ours are excited, but we never stopped to ask if what we were telling them is actually true. We will just repeat these exciting phrases, without knowing what they mean or whether they are true, and use them to deny or refute actual facts because they appeal to our prejudices and emotional reactions, our need to feel emotions about things. I had the fascinating experience just last week of being told that my own personal experience and knowledge of a subject, the result of years of genuine scholarship of the topic, was irrelevant or meaningless, that I was duped and fooled, because it conflicted with the exciting and easily repeatable phrases they read on the internet. It used to be a joke that "I read it on the internet so it must be true" but somehow it became a reality. I like propaganda so much because it can shut down rational thought in an instant and make us repeat things that are meaningless or outright false, and deny or refute any actual facts which can't be stated in such tight and thrilling terms. It makes us revel in prejudice and ignorance as if they were virtues.

Reason and emotion are two equally valid aspects of human thought. Like socks and hats, they are useful for their own purposes, but you don't want to use one in place of the other. Propaganda will make you wear a sock on your head and a hat on your foot, and declare other people evil or insane for not doing likewise.