Movies

Black Belly of the Tarantula (1971) Directed by Paolo Cavara, who got his start in film as a shockumentarian with Mondo Cane. The gimmick this time is that the black-clad gloved fiend murders naked women by paralyzing them with a needle in the back of the brain and cuts their bellies open while they are paralyzed and fully conscious, as explained by a scientist in a white lab coat and stock footage of a fight between a spider and a Tarantula Hawk Wasp. This seems more a transitional phase between the Giallo and Eurocrime forms since the protagonist is not the woman in peril but the disillusioned police detective, played by Giancarlo Giannini. This is not a very strong story, rather baroque - lots of little offshoots spiraling into dead ends which were never made to seem important in the first place. There were some interesting scenes and settings, such as a room full of mannequins in the back of a furrier's shop, but nothing super-great.In fact the most interesting part of it for me was seeing mod decorative props re-used from Seven Bloodstained Orchids. Kept my interest but wasn't really enthralling. 5/10

Rectilinear b/w stereophonograph and abstract paintings in

Black Belly of the Tarantula

... and in Seven Bloodstained Orchids

Movies

I have decided to enjoy some Italian thrillers for the next week or so.

Seven Bloodstained Orchids (1972) Directed by Umberto Lenzi who would later gain notice for the grisliest zombie and cannibal movies, this is an exemplary entry into the giallo genre. Which is to say it is an example of it. A black-gloved killer is murdering women and leaving behind an enigmatic talisman. The protagonists must discover how the women are connected to prevent more murders. The story is excessively contrived with multiple layers of misdirection and concealment so that when discoveries are made they provide little emotional relief. It is made as lurid as possible with gratuitous female nudity and gay junkie drug parties, and the psychological implications of the violent attacks on vulnerable women at that sociohistorical period are obvious and have probably been investigated deeply and repeatedly. The two really good things about this are the settings and soundtrack. Each interior location has a completely different style of art on the walls, and one fabulous country hideaway is laden with as much freakish Italo-mod design as it can hold. Riz Ortolani's harpsichord-based themes are the perfect accompaniment to the numerous scenes of a convertible sports car tearing down country highways. 5/10

Seven Notes in Black (a.k.a. The Psychic) 1977, directed by Lucio Fulci (who also would go on to the most gruesome of zombie movies), is much more sophisticated in every way. Its basic conceit is perfect for a mystery thriller - a woman's clairvoyant visions of murder are a set of disconnected snapshots, puzzle pieces that can be put together in any pattern. This concept of providing the primary clues without a context works extremely well in setting up the maze of discoveries which must follow. Jennifer O'Neil must first convince a world of scoffing men that her visions are valid, then work with them to discover where and when and who. This seems to have passed beyond the crude emotional reactionism to societal change evident in Seven Bloodstained Orchids and most other films in the genre, but relies still on a woman in peril who must enlist the aid and strength of men. I think it is these social settings that interest me as much as the simple enjoyment of making it through a contorted plot. 7/10

The top 30 things THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO KNOW!!!

1. Stuff They Don't Want You To Know
2. 20 Things They Don't Want You to Know
3. Hydrogen Peroxide H2O2 Secrets THEY Don't Want You to Know
4. 6 True Stories About Disneyland They Don't Want You to Know
5. What They Don't Want You to Know About the Euro Crisis
6. The Weight Loss Cure 'They' Don't Want You to Know About
7. WHAT THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO KNOW ABOUT MUSLIM-JEWISH RELATIONS
8. What they don't want you to know about the coming oil crisis
9. 20 Things They don't want you to know
10. What They Don't Want You to Know About 4G
11. 10 Things the Food Industry Doesn't Want You to Know
12. Nutrition Secrets “They” Don't Want You to Know About
13. M.D.O.D.: Natural Cures They Don't Want You To Know About
14. ThinkProgress » 10 Things Conservatives Don't Want You To Know
15. Farmer Jim's Blog » What They Don't Want You To Know
16. "Free Money Book" They don't want you to know about?
17. Daily Kos: They don't want you to know who paid for that ad
18. Doctors of Deception: What They Don't Want You To Know about Shock Treatment
19. The Hawaii They Don't Want You to Know About
20. The mutual fund 'they' don't want you to know about
21. 9 Secrets Health Insurers Don't Want You to Know
22. The Con Man That THEY Don't Want You To Know About
23. Washington's dirty little secret they don't want you to know about
24. The bedbug cure THEY don't want you to know about
25. Michael Jackson: What They Don't Want You To Know
26. Hijacking Humanity - The Movie "They" Don't Want You To Know About!
27. The Cancer Cure THEY Don't Want You To Know About
28. Obamacare – 8 Metrics They Don't Want You to Know
29. Butter--The Healthy Fat "They" Don't Want You to Know About
30. 5 Things They Don't Want You To Know About Medical Marijuana
31. #2 and #9 ARE THE SAME!!

Joke Evolution A.K.A. The Cookie Joke

Feb 28 2011:

http://caffertyfile.blogs.cnn.com/2011/02/28/should-the-power-of-public-labor-unions-be-reduced/

A unionized public employee, a member of the Tea Party, and a CEO are sitting at a table. In the middle of the table there is a plate with a dozen cookies on it. The CEO reaches across and takes 11 cookies looks at the Tea Partier and says,"look out for that union guy, he wants a piece of your cookie."

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110228123116AAAy9eY

A CEO, tea-bagger and a union worker are sitting around a table, which has a plate with a dozen cookies on it. The CEO takes eleven of the cookies, then turns to the tea-bagger and says "Watch out. That union thug wants to steal your cookie."

Mar 1 2011:

http://www.flickr.com/groups/global_photojournalism_news_protest_and_culture/discuss/72157626174726264/

Did you hear the one about the Koch Brothers, the tea party member, and the democrat who sat down to share a dozen cookies? The Koch brothers ate 11 then turned to the tea party member and said "you better watch that socialist. He wants to steal your cookie!"

Mar 2 2011:

http://www.courierpress.com/news/2011/mar/02/gov-daniels-indiana-house-impasse-may-preclude-whi/

A CEO, a union guy, and Mitch Daniels were sitting at a table with a dozen donuts. The CEO grabbed 11 of them right away. When the union guy reached for the last one, Daniels said to the CEO, "That union guy is trying to steal your donut!"

http://www.houseoffusion.com/groups/cf-community/thread.cfm/threadid:33001

A corporate fat cat, tea party activist, and a worker are sitting a table and someone brings them 
a plate of 10 cookies... Immediately, the fat cat grabs 9 of the cookies. He then leans over to 
the worker and whispers "you'd better look out for that tea party guy, 
I think he's going to try to steal your cookie".

March 3 2011:

http://www.topix.com/forum/us/politics/TV54HIBD7K6D8333I/p3

A CEO, a Tea Party member and a union employee sit down at a table with a dozen cookies. The CEO takes 11 cookies and then whispers in the ear of the Tea Party member, "Hey, that union guy is trying to steal your cookie so you better get on that."

March 4 2011:

http://breadbin.blogspot.com/2011/03/why.html

A CEO, a union member, and a front-line worker were standing in front of a cookie jar. The CEO opened the jar, withdrew eleven of the twelve cookies in there, and put them in his suit pocket. He then turned to the front-line worker and said, "watch out for that union guy! He's trying to steal your cookie!

March 5 2011:

http://voxverax.blogspot.com/2011/03/progressive-ponderings-is-somebody.html

A CEO, a Tea Party member and public teacher unionist met at a coffee shop. Soon the waitress brought a dozen cookies to the table. The CEO immediately grabbed eleven. Then he turned to the Tea Partier and said, “Watch that union guy; he’s trying to steal your cookie.”

March 6 2011:

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2011/03/bob-mcdonnell-virginia-governor-state-of-the-state.html

A Wall Street banker, a Tea Party guy and a union lady are standing around a dozen cookies. The banker grabs 11 cookies and tells the Tea Party guy, “That union lady is trying to steal your cookie.”

March 28 2011:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/the-midwests-new-class-politics/2011/03/25/AFsscjkB_story.html

(rather poorly told, but the version now being quoted most because of its source)

Barrett recounted a parable making the rounds among Wisconsin Democrats, telling of a room in which “a zillionaire, a Tea Party person and a union member” confront a plate of 12 cookies: “The zillionaire takes 11 of the cookies, and says to the other two, ‘That guy is trying to steal your cookie.’ ”

ADDENDUM - October 10 2011: 
(As retold by CTH on Facebook)
A billionaire sits at a table with a Tea Partier and a poor person. There are ten cookies on the table; the billionaire takes 9 then says to the Tea Partier, "Watch that guy -- he's after your cookie!"

ADDENDUM - August 6 2015:
(As posted by Europe Says OXI on Facebook) This version apparently has a connection with the Euro-Greek financial crisis.
























Addendum: October 1, 2018, as posted by Left Action on Facebook.

Addendum: March 7, 2021, found on Facebook.

Letter to a friend

Dear Xxxx;

I live in the Kooks Museum. I have studied kooks, cranks, cults and conspiracies for decades and know that though the content may vary, the form remains the same. I know how exciting it is to find a conspiracy theory you can really get your teeth into and be a big expert on and know all the elaborate details that make you the one who knows, and anyone who disagrees is pitiably ignorant of the important facts of this thing, which in reality has nothing to do with any of us and is really just a lot of people quoting people quoting people who read something somewhere, who have absolutely no direct personal knowledge or experience of the thing and would not be negatively effected if they woke up the next day and all knowledge of the subject was wiped from their minds. It's always interesting, but kind of sad, to see someone I like get swallowed up in one of these things, but luckily this is the kind of topic that will blow over in a few months. I knew a guy who suddenly became a Money Crank, boring the living hell out of everyone around him by constantly babbling about monetary theory, capitalism, inflation and the shocking Federal Reserve fraud. My acquaintanceship with him ended because I wrote to him as openly and honestly as I am to you, that I was glad he found something he really enjoyed, but sorry to see him making such a damn fool of himself. That's the same thing I am saying to you now, and if you need to defriend me over it, that will be a shame. I think you are a really nice guy and I always enjoyed reading what you had to say about things until you went off on this idiotic bullshit. I hope you work your way through it soon and get back to being funny and interesting instead of self-righteous and pedantic on this incredibly uninteresting and irrelevant crap.

Elderly Woman Crashes Car Into Hair Salon

Salem Oregon, Feb. 25 2011: "A 78-year-old Salem woman stepped on the wrong pedal and crashed her Thunderbird into a hair salon Friday morning."

Plainfield Township Michigan, April 4 2010: "An elderly Michigan woman who accidentally crashed her car into a hair salon while attempting to park said she stuck around the scene to keep her appointment."

Rogersville Tennesee, April 2 2010: "Two people were injured Friday morning in Rogersville when an elderly motorist on her way to a hair appointment drove her Honda Accord through the front of a hair salon on Apple Lane off of East Main Street."

Milford Connecticut, Feb. 4 2011: "An elderly woman drove her car into the strip mall at Pond Point Plaza, but walked away with no visible injuries. The unidentified woman smashed her white Nissan Sentra into a store for lease next to the hair salon at the plaza around noon." ALMOST!

Tigard Oregon, December 10 2008: "An elderly woman accidentally crashed her car into a Tigard hair salon Tuesday morning, injuring three people inside."

Annapolis Maryland, September 6 2009: "Besides the smoke, the squealing tires and the shattered glass, an elderly woman's sudden car crash into an Annapolis-area beauty salon yesterday afternoon was nothing short of remarkable."

Sanford Florida, December 22 2010: "An elderly woman crashed into a downtown Sanford hair salon and then into a restaurant Wednesday, according to police. "

Phoenix Arizona, March 3 2009: "An elderly woman crashed her car through the front door of a west Phoenix hair salon Tuesday morning."

Ventura County California, January 30 2009: "A woman drover her car into a Newbury Park beauty salon Friday afternoon, narrowly missing a group of patrons and employees before crashing into the back wall."

Orleans Massachusetts, May 21 2009: " Four people were hurt when an elderly woman crashed her car into a salon Thursday morning at the ProCuts on Route 6A in Orleans."

Leicestershire England, June 4 2010: "Beauty salon staff and customers avoided injury when an elderly driver smashed her car through the shop front. The confused motorist ploughed through the double doors and plate glass window of Jackie Walker Hair and Beauty in Biggin Street, Loughborough, narrowly missing people inside."

British Columbia, Canada, December 7 2010:"Police said driver confusion sent a vehicle through the front window of a local business in Ladysmith Monday afternoon, while people were inside the building."

Wilton Manners Florida, December 1 2010: "Police have cited a driver who crashed into a hair salon after she hit the gas instead of the brakes."

Bethesda Maryland, October 24 2010: "Investigators are working to determine the circumstances leading to an accident in which an elderly driver struck a parked car before plowing into Alexis Hair Salon."

Tallahassee Florida, September 23 2010: "It happened at Salon Centric on Thomasville Road at about 11:30 a.m. Police say 73-year-old Virginia Hart mistakenly hit the gas instead of the brake and her Honda Pilot lurched forward."

Movies

Black Moon (1934) Voodoo thriller - a woman is mystically drawn back to her island birthplace to take her place as white voodoo queen. Interesting to me was the fact that the leaders of the creole-speaking natives are depicted with a certain threatening dignity, while the Georgia-born "good darkie" (Clarence Muse, who rarely had an opportunity to show his real talents) is an unfortunate stereotype. As these things often do, the story is turned into a symbolic victory of christianity over paganism. The mass voodoo ritual scenes suffer greatly from not having been shot at night. Cast includes Fay Wray in her dark haired mode, cute but not a great actress. A good try but not a real success. 4/10

Kentucky Kernels (1934) Comedy duo Wheeler and Woolsey are guardians to orphaned Spanky McFarland, who falls heir to a Kentucky feud. Sometimes it is funny, and there is a song. 5/10

I Thank You (1941) British comedy duo Arthur Askey and Richard Murdoch, trying to get financing for a show, must take a job as a husband and wife footman and cook. Wartime references include sleeping on subway platforms, unavailability of foodstuffs, and firespotting from rooftops, and many of the supporting players are probably recognizable to those with a greater knowledge of the British music hall. Sometimes it is funny and there are songs. 5/10

Johnny Cool (1963) Henry Silva stars as a Sicilian bandit recruited by a deported Italo-american gangster to enact his vengeance. Wide-eyed and beautiful Elizabeth Montgomery is an aimless socialite awakened to the realities of life by her brief encounter with this dispassionately violent man. At times startling and fierce in its action and imagery, it seems to have been a break from drivel and trivia by producer/director William Asher, and it shows where his real strengths were - not here. A sophisticated, not always believable story with numerous flashy cameos including an uncharacteristically threatening appearance by affable John McGiver. Many of the cameos, like Mort Sahl's, have a "Look who's here!" feel, and it is easy to see who is a real actor and who isn't. Kind of great in certain ways, and overall an interesting and unusual experience. 7/10