OBSCENE GESTURE

The estate of Danny Kaye released a statement today apologizing for this shocking scene in 1944's Up in Arms. “The obscene gesture in the performance was completely inappropriate, very disappointing, and we apologize to our fans,” the statement said. Steps are being taken to recall all copies of the film and remove or alter the offensive footage.  Because seeing a finger is so horrible.

Movies

The Secret (2006) This is the most unintentionally hilarious movie I have ever seen. The insanely overproduced opening sequence, in which absolutely everything rushes, whooshes, clangs and booms, is a howl a second, and the rest of the film maintains a steady pace of atrocious absurdities. It goes from simple common sense one moment, to headsmacking non sequitur or astonishing obvious bullshit the next. Authority figures with lots of letters after their names to show how much they know, with professional titles like Visionary and Quantum Physicist, babble modernized versions of old-timey positive/magical thinking rants, illustrated by infomercial-class "examples" of success and failure like how locking your bike makes it get stolen. I love the way thoughts explode out of your head like lightwaves to cover the entire earth and whoosh out into the universe, to make what you want appear at your door. Hucksters of all varieties explain how they make parking spots and million-dollar checks appear just by thinking about them. In spite of its absolute idiocy I still found myself propagandized by it, actually applying its happiness-oriented visualization techniques the moment I awoke this morning. That's good mind-control, when you're laughing at its stupidity yet still doing it. A timeless classic. 10/10

Funny

Somebody says I wrote this once:

We never used to have humor, we had to laugh at tragedy. Used to go down to the Golden Age Home and wait for someone to die, just to have a chuckle. A funeral was as good as a variety show to us. Some days there was nothing to laugh at but the weather. A good stiff breeze blowing and we thought we were in a Vaudeville house. Even then we sometimes had nothing to laugh at but earthworks, a ditch maybe, or a wagon rut. A slight elevation or declivity was as good to us as any of your modern comedy routines. Pile up a bit of sand, and do our best to make merry. Even then we were lucky to have that. I recall the time we found a rabbit track, didn't we howl then. Many a time I spent the day giggling over a pebble or a bit of a twig no longer than your thumbnail. A slight discoloration or unevenness, even a barely perceptible stain would do us fine for a laugh or two. No we didn't have much but we made do.

HAW HAW HAW

It's funny because it is like a satire.