Friday, May 1, 2009

Books I Never Meant to Write

While poking around in my filing cabinet I found this list of book titles and blurbs. I have no idea when I wrote it or what I had in mind when I did.

One Lonely Broad - Simon Spite, Hatemaster, gets his kicks from killing chicks. "Brutal and ugly" - Librarian's Journal

Murder Out the Ass

Stupid Little Bitch - She only had one thing on her mind, but she didn't know what it was.

The Thing From Space - No-one knew what it was or where it came from, they only knew it was here.

Swamp Robot - An escaped convict and a lusty negress come face to face with the inexplicable

Hillbilly Homo - Luther didn't know his ass from a hole in the ground, but nobody seemed to mind, least of all the Sheriff!

Butcher My Baby - Simon Spite, Hatemaster

Pardon my Chainsaw - The wild, poignant and gory adventures of an emergency room intern

The Monster In Your Nose
- The nation's number one health hazard may be clinging to the inside of your nostrils!

The Awesome Power Of Your Fists - Learn how to get anything you want using the world's oldest management tool

Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! - Ripped from the pages of tomorrow's headlines, the shocking story of the fed-up generation

Rustlers from the Stars

I'll Kill You, You Bastard (Hatemaster)

The Burning Wind - A stirring novel of forbidden passions unleashed, "Has all the ingredients." - Book Review Weekly

Garden of Love - Strips away the veil of secrecy and lays bare the until-now hidden secret world of vegetable passion